Zee or back to A?

One side effect thats kind of good to being jobless is that I get to spend more time with my folks, doing the things they like to do...
Hence my tryst with TV and Zee, started anew after Hip Hip Hurray( a super duper serial series every Wednesday, 7:30 pm in 1998) and the prime time serials that have my mom hooked had to be watched..without fail!

From 7:30pm to 10:00pm, six shows that have families and Indian women as their central themes.
And in every story, there is a love story, a saas-bahu or a bhabi-nayi dulhan or a landlord-opressed heroine equation.
A series about Jhansi Ki Rani Laxmi Bai, revolves around her childhood, her becoming the Rani and eventually her fighting off the British, though we are still stuck at the time frame of her getting married to a king who's twice her age.
Here there are subplots of wicked women trying to kill the king, overthrow him and take the throne, and a mother figure who obviously gets possessive of the king being enamored with his new wife and a naachwaali who wants to be the queen and then submits because of our queen's inherent goodness.
Admist all this is a subplot where an old man, the child queen's dad is put in a spot, all part of a bigger conspiracy.
He is sentenced to marry a girl his daughter's age as the fair king decides that the girl who is said to have been raped or mislead by this man should be meted out justice in this manner.
Well, believable, acceptable that being the 1840's and Indian society being the way it was.

Now, the pea beneath my mattress being the next show, Pavitra Rishta.
Set in contemporary Mumbai, this is about two middle class Marathi families, who have members working in Garages, Banks, Railways and Private Sector Companies, who are constantly exposed to all media including TV and Internet, and behave like any other family next door.

Here the serial focuses on the main protagonists oncoming divorce, the main lead's re-marriage to his late brother's pregnant fiance ( aakhir aane wale bacchen ko baap ka naam milna chahiye na... i.e the baby being born should not be a bastard child and have a dad...) which in itself is full of loopholes.
The subplot being the hero's sister who is traumatised by a bad guy ( every serial has to have that, a bad guy who is bad, just because!).
He takes offensive pictures that are so taken to give an image that he has raped her, and then goes around the place mouthing apologies for raping her! ( you get the subtext right? he wants to badmouth her, so he badmouths her saying he has destroyed her, uska izzat loot liya hain and all the while no one asks why is he announcing it if he is actually ashamed of that heinous crime as he is propaganding to be?)
All the while, the girl feels ashamed, wants to commit suicide, and then as a way out gets married to the same loser bad guy, because no one will believe her and no one will marry her.

My questions now are :

1. In India, in the 1840's maybe a woman had to have a husband to defend herself, and her izzat was up for questioning, so maybe that was her only way out other than suicide or becoming an outcaste.
In India, even in 2010, is that the only option?

All my childhood, the late 80's and 90's Hindi and Telugu movies showed us women who were side supporting cast, getting raped and getting married to the villain to protect their honour..so called honour.
Does a woman being raped still mean a woman being degraded and because of that her life coming to a screeching halt? or more, is it a dead end?

With every trauma, every societal abuse that a women faces, halts accompany.
Perspectives shift on a personal level and everything about that woman or person will change, fight, rebel, accept defeat or cringe at the injustice meted out to her/him by fate.
But, getting married, or in essence joining forces with the personal demon an option?
Or is suicide because the person is unwilling to continue an option?
I understand that even in today's India, even in our most developed cities, women who hail from conservative families will want to close themselves and hide the shameful incident, but what I cannot understand is why they chose to be ashamed of something that is not their doing?
In a world, where sex is extremely becoming casual, whether the well-educated and well to do families think it so or call it dating or moving with the times or the middle class call it affairs or the lower classes, the more numbered populace below poverty class and a little above rung of struggling to maintain families of 5 on an income of 10k per month call it something else, something more shameful or nothing at all, the truth persists.
Casual Sex is commonplace more so in our country, in all the shadows and nooks and crannies that we subconsciously avoid.
In this world, a woman is to be ashamed of being raped?
Or is she to be rightfully furious and prejudiced against the world that allows this?

2. Our media, with all its high technology, its widespread reach and ability to entertain and influence, with all of its throbbing talent and intelligence, is trying to gain TRPs through pushing us back to the 19th Century?

I know we are a corrupt nation, a pretty backward nation in terms of prejudices and societal notions, but a nation that allows rape to be embalmed and patronized on Prime Time National Television ( Ok, I know, strictly speaking DD qualifies for that term, but using it in the term of a channel with a national reach, regional channels includes many other television channels now) for a family audience?
Women and children who are the keys to the way a family thinks, especially where family matters that are not about business or making money but about family values and principles, are given these messages on a repeated basis.

Sindur and Ghunghat is of prime importance for a respectable women.
Husband and father are of utmost importance, never to be questioned.
Shaadi ruk jaaye after the cards are printed, because the guy is a cheapo, girl will never get a good rishta again.
Child marriage is still acceptable in Rajasthan and Gujarat.
Dark girl gets bad guy, lower caste woman cannot be adopted into a Pundit's family.
Pregnancy before being a Mrs. on records is to be ashamed of, whether the girl was raped or the groom died on his way to the mandap or the girl and the guy were in love.
And so on...

From a matriarchal society to a patriarchal one, to one where we are now embracing values of the west, where our news channels are constantly bring up faltoo discussions on live in relationships and love marriages( though they have been commonplace for more than 60 years now, whether upfront or not) our prime time TV is all about values my great grandmother believed in..or even before that, when girl child education was taboo, and sati accepted.

Luckily, my mother was educated and enjoys the farce.
What about my maid and her mom?
Or what about her cousin who lives in rural Telangana and is married with a kid although she turned 19 on the 16th of this March?
What about all of them in other rural districts, soon to be claimed states in the rest of my country who watch this on their colour TVs whenever they have electricity?

Why is it that Zee and other family channels, with their hit serials, (Balika Vadhu and Bhagya Vidhata on Colors, Godbharai on Sony, Yeh Rishta Kya Kehlata Hain and Bidai on Star Plus) seem to be passing on these viewpoints through so called entertainment and Drama/ Serials/ Soaps?

In this context, not to forget, Splitsvilla and Dare to Date on MTV and Channel V respectively, tried very hard but couldn't watch more than 3 minutes ( a personal record) of even a single episode of any season.

Why are we sticking to the value systems that neither the makers nor the viewers nor the performers believe in?
Is this the only form of entertainment left to us on a daily basis on our TV screens?

Anyway, learnt two thing froms this entire tryst, one I shouldn't be watching this and should be wary of all who are watching it, never know when one auntyji might come and call me names.
And two, there is a dearth of talent in our media industry, and a huge opportunity for the Farhan Akhtar and the Abhay Deol types.
Only requisites being Talent, thode bahut paise and industry contacts to gain a foothold, before riding in to change the way our women think.

Anyone out there? Let me know, I'll work for very less and be very committed!