long delayed!

always assumed that i had made this one, but it dawned on me today that i though there was another id with the same name, i somehow never brought the banner here!

anyway, now that it is here in all its glorious and very real chatta-ness, am at a lack of things to post..

what would be apt enough to sit on this page, of course anything that i write, sits on it's own throne or high chair as per individual perception, but what is going to be the balancing act, on the see saw of my private stories and theorized repeats of the same, that would be public enough to share..

well there is still a while before i stop oscillating, for now, there is this perception that i needed to put out before it dissolves into the nothingness of my head,

and as usual, it is again to do with me, the eternal self love always wins!

ok enough of 'build up' , and to the point..

just like, though am always reasoning that it's better to be prepared for the worst and am always pessimistic about the results for mua case, simultaneously never actually letting go of the hope of news that will bring good...similarly, never do i actually get rid of the birdie that causes me so much agony and sometimes bitterness, but once bitten never shy is what this birdie does to me, and so what i figured out from all the above chatta is that although, i have gotten rid of the expecting part of the attachment clause, i still do expect them to demand so that i can give and then have the link unbroken, and therefore am still attached!!

but yet this gives me that certain edge that precisely the knife stands on, because i can still not expect in the straight sense, and thus let go of that..but i still can miss all that i want, wait all that i want for all those i want, and thus still be attached in the ghumake-firake sense!

well the geometry is confusing, but anyway, the point is, that all this led me to one nice self flattering funda..

i am an optimist who believes in the fayada that pessimism brings and thus all the silence in me can just turn into ripples and then noise at the tiniest wisp of breath, be it mine or anyone elses...

aaaaah, now who that anyone else could be, who could probably qualify for that title..

long story!

my coffee awaits and have a long day ahead...lots of shopping and masti, and a little bit of work as well...wow, am already raring to go! the sense and tingling of anticipation is swirling with the coffee!

chalo then,

just hope that i do half the things that am cojuring up in the air!

wakkay..

namaste!

GOOD MORNING!!!!!!!!